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Dear Friend,

Thank you for taking the time to visit my site.  Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) can be a very confusing, exhausting, and heartbreaking disorder to live with every day. Children who suffer from RAD will often go to very extreme measures to gain control over their parents, teachers, and family members. If left untreated, RAD can destroy even the most loving and stable of families. 

I do not claim to be an expert on RAD, nor do I intend for this site to replace the advice of the professionals that you may be working with.  I'm just a mother that has come to realize the importance of obtaining proper treatment for children with RAD.  I want to reach out and let other RAD parents know that there really is hope for these children... and for their families.  Sadly enough, it took six long years before somebody finally suggested that our son might be suffering from RAD.  By that time our family was already in trouble, and extremely damaged.   I almost gave up on my Little Prince because I didn't think that I had the strength to be the mother that he so desperately needed me to be.  Our lives had become such an awful mess, and it seemed as if nobody really understood.

My goal here is to create a warm and friendly environment for other RAD parents.  A place where parents can go to escape when life gets just a little too overwhelming.   A place where you can always find a friend that will listen.  A place where you can go to laugh... to cry... or even to scream if you need to.   A place where you can share your hopes... your deepest fears... and your dreams for the future.  A place where someone understands.

I'm going to take you along with me on an amazing journey. I'm going to introduce you to a  rather unique King, who spends his days holding small children... talking into shoes... and performing miracles.  I want you to walk along beside me and explore an entirely new world.  A world that's filled with hope... and success.  A world where Kings and Queens rule, and where a Little Prince can only dream of the day when he will be "The King."  

Let me take you there!


Prayer Board
Venting Letter - Feel Like Quitting
Ask the Doctor
Venting Letter - Dear Daughter
Another Update
Chat Room
A RAD Story - Win Win Win
TLP Humor - 50 Shades of Gray
Meditation - I Am What I Am
Venting Letter - I Can't Wait

Since Sept 4, 2002

Love Is
Family Life
No Conscience
Sleepless Nights
A Call for Help
The King (Our AT)
The Woodpile
Therapist Eyes
A Lesson
Oh,Little House
The Dance
Does this Look Familiar?
The Nightmare
Emotions Run Deep
1 Year of Therapy
Joe’s Bubble Game
Therapist on Wheels
Busting Out
Promise and Love
2 Years of Therapy
Snowed In
The Birds and Bees
The Battle
Time Travel
3 Years of Therapy
Celebration of Life
Residential Placement
Merry Christmas
Where Are You
The Prosecution
I Hate You!
The Homecoming
Thank You
The Wrong School
Marshmallow Peeps
Respite Dream Home
Dear RAD Parents
TLP's Anoles
Tulip Meatloaf
Baby Steps
Interesting Conversation
A Smile and a Compliment
More Progress
TLP's Journal : Life
TLP's Journal : A Lesson from L
TLP's Journal : Regarding School
TLP's Journal : More Regarding School & Life
TLP's Journal: Map Project
TLP's Journal : A Confession
TLP's Journal : Helping Others
Good Stuff
TLP's Journal : Young Entrepreneur
TLP's Journal : My Camping Trip with C
TLP's Journal:  I Wonder
More Photographs by TLP
Just Another Dream...
Tenth Grade (age 16)
Refinishing the Old
TLP's Journal : Awareness
TLP's Journal : I Needed to Know
TLP's Journal : Nature... and Healing by TLP (age 16)
Broken Dreams
TLP's Journal : Old Memories (before age 4) by TLP
TLP's Journal : Advice to Adoptive Parents (age 16)
TLP's Journal : I Want to Break Free by TLP (age 17)
TLP's Journal : Playing the Role
TLP's Journal : Final Posting by TLP (age 17)
Growing Pot
Oil Thief
TLP's Journal : Cinnamon
Summary of Neuro-Psych Testing
Happy New Year 2010
Dear Special Ed. Director
Approaching Age Eighteen
It’s Not ALL About Africa, People!!!!!!!!!!!
TLP's Song
My Home Ship
Pure Craziness
The Anchor Holds
Dear Honorable Judge
Coming Home
TLP's Journal : Fears by TLP (age 18)
Another Update - 2012

         Surviving Life with Reactive Attachment Disorder
What is RAD?
The Mouse Story

by Suzanne

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19

Our Personal Story

The Broken Room

As she sits ever so quietly
in the corner of the broken room...
she smiles.

When she catches a glimpse of the moonlight
forming a warm glow around his sleeping face...
she cries.

As she reaches out her hand
unable to resist the urge to run her fingers through the dark curls...
she smiles.

When the simple touch of her hand
causes him to flinch and pull away...
she cries.

As she quietly moves herself
back to the corner of the broken room,
she sits ever so quietly...
watching him...
loving him...
and reminding herself that tomorrow is another day.
Then she smiles.

Copyright © 2002 Suzanne

The World of RAD

Imagine yourself at an amusement park, and you've just taken a seat on one of the largest roller coasters in the park. The ride begins, and you ever so slowly begin that long steep climb to the very top of the tracks. When you finally reach the top, you hold on so tight that your knuckles turn white, and you begin to brace yourself for that first sudden drop to the bottom. From then on... you know that there's no turning back. Your heart starts to race... and all you can do is just hold on really tight as you brave the many twists... turns... and dips that lie ahead.  At times, you can almost feel your heart drop into your stomach as your body is quickly turned upside down... and spun around in circles.  Just when you think you can't hold on for much longer, you begin to feel the cars slowing down... and you can start to breathe a little easier knowing that the ride is almost over. When the roller coaster stops at its final destination, you breathe a big sigh of relief... smile... and congratulate yourself for not losing your lunch.

But... what if the roller coaster never came to a complete stop?   What if it only slowed down for a short time and then began to make that long steep climb back up to the top again... quickly dropping you down to the bottom... sending you back through all of the same series of twists and turns... flipping you upside down until your stomach starts to churn all over again?  Then... just as the roller coaster begins to slow down once again, and you can feel yourself starting to relax... and breathe normally... you are completely horrified to find that it's slowly beginning to carry you right back up that steep hill again.  What if the roller coaster never stopped?  What if the ride continued to go on for two... four... or even six years?  Imagine living out your life on a giant roller coaster.  Imagine spending every day of your life slowly climbing up steep hills, knowing that once you finally reach the top, someone's going to push you back over the edge... and send you spiraling back down to the very bottom again.   Imagine waking up each morning knowing that you'll be spending your entire day being spun around in circles.  Imagine trying to function throughout the day as your heart is being twisted and turned in every direction, and your world is constantly being turned upside down.  Imagine trying to speak... or smile... while you're holding your breath.  Imagine spending each and every day of your life riding a giant roller coaster... knowing that you may never reach your final destination.  Welcome to the world of RAD! 
"Welcome to TLP.   It is such a great place and I must say that it has saved me many times too."
"TLP has been a goldmine of encouragment for us!
Both the website and the boy!"
: )
"Welcome to the friendliest and most comforting place on the face of the world for stressed out parents."
"TLP" is a family and they have supported me through so many difficult times.
I think I would have lost it if I didn't have this site.  
"This site has been a Godsend to me.
It's such a relief to have people to talk to who you don't have to explain everything to.
Hope you can find some comfort here."   
-North Dakota
"TLP has been an invaluable lifeline for us.   I read here at least daily, unless I am away on vacation.  Having a place to come where there are other RAD moms who truly understand is priceless."

"We have found this message board to be an invaluable tool.  The wealth of experience here is unmatched.
Make sure you check out all areas of this website. One of the most wonderful tools available is TLP's Journal.
He presents his life to us in a way that makes us better understand our own kiddos."
-West Virginia
"This site has given me more support and information than I've received anywhere else,
and the support of other parents is invaluable."
-New York
"TLP is the only free and useful help under RAD.   Thank God for TLP.  
I love TLP and am so grateful for all that I have learned from all of you, and for your support."
"I am very thankful for the information,the support, the kindness and the dedication of everyone here."
"Suz, It is because of your unflagging support and the website that you created
that my family is still together after 6 years."
"Suz, I admire that you have used hardship in your life to help others via this website.
You may never fully know how much of a lifeline it is to myself and other RAD families."
"Suz, You have given me hope during those hopeless moments, peace during the turmoil, and a glimps of light through the darkness!!   So thank you so very much for being the you that you are and letting His light shine through!! "
"I know that anytime I need advice or just someone to listen, I can come here.
That alone makes my life much more tolerable!"
"You have taught me a lot through your writings and posts on this site.    I can't say I have ever before lived with a child who disassociates and rages like this, and I have been able to apply a lot of things you share in your writings about your experience with TLP.   So.... thanks for this site."

Sign InView Entries
Please don't forget to sign my Guest Book before you leave.
What's New!
I release the need for others to validate
or believe my experience.

I find validation
within myself.
I Am a Healer.

I heal my child
through my words, thoughts, and deeds.

I speak highly of my child
to other people.

I know that he is
always listening.

The world breaks everyone

and afterward...

many are strong
in the broken places.
Have a heart that
never hardens,

a temper
that never tires,

a touch
that never hurts. 
“I remember vividly feeling exactly as you do right now when I first found Suz.  
It is like the light in a dark room.”
–North Dakota
“TLP is my extended family, and a lifeline for 5 years.  
We are all in this together.... survivors in a life boat floating on the seas of a RAD storm.”
“I just wanted to come here today, as I know you all understand
and I don't think anyone else on this earth does right now.”
“Hi Suz,  I just wanted to tell you how much I appreciate your openness and
honesty to exposing your heart. In doing this you teach us so much about
ourselves and about doing our own work.   You are special.” 
“You were blessed beyond belief when you found this place!   I know I was! 
It was like leaving the woods and coming into the bright sunshine!  
In the woods- there were brambles & thorns and no distinguishable path. 
When I found TLP, it was a huge open meadow before me!” 
-New York
What People are Saying About  'The Little Prince'  Website and  MESSAGE BOARD
"Just a quick note as I was feeling so grateful for the tools I've learned through
rubbing cyber shoulders with you all. I can move into some needed
responses to "situations" with more grace and ease because of you."
"If I only had one day to live, you my TLP family would be right up at the top of the list,
to spend some time with, to say how much I care and to say thank you.
I appreciate you all very much."

"I often tell Suz if it wasn't for this board, I never would have been able to keep her (my daughter).
Honestly, I needed support and someone to tell me they’ve been through this and survived,
and someone to vent to when I thought I couldn't do it anymore (which happened almost everyday)."
"So......I just am so thankful that I already knew, because of your Ministry
called TLP, that I am not alone in this job of loving a child who right now does not know
how to love or be loved. God knew I would need your experience with TLP to encourage
me in my timewith my daughter.....which I hope gives you courage to keep
fighting over there for your newly 18 yr old child.... while we fight over here for ours."

"I found TLP during my time serving the women and children at the crisis pregnancy home.  
Not sure I would have survived more than 6 months without my friends at TLP."
"I am also most grateful for TLP.   I too doubt that I could have made it through the first 2
or 3 years with our daughter.   It has been a huge blessing to come here and say what ever
I have to say, good or bad, and know that others understand and don't judge.   I can admit sometimes I am a horrible mother, sometimes I can't stand my kid, sometimes I am
filled with pride and hope, sometimes I am filled with dread.   It has been received and
held with thoughtful care, without anyone needing to rescue me or tell me to try harder.  
(uggh..... I hate that)"
"I wanted to say thanks for the work you’ve done in creating and maintaining
your Web site, but even more for showing me that there are parents who can love really, really difficult children. I’m close to your age, with no children of my own, and have been working for a very long time to cope with the consequences of my early life. Superficially, I don’t resemble someone with RAD. Internally, in a lot of important ways, I do, and I’ve been struggling very hard. Reading about attachment disorders is helping me find a new way to approach being “stuck” and constantly sabotaging myself. It’s giving me a little more patience, maybe. And every time I see a parent like you who loves and fights for a difficult, destructive child, I am amazed and awed. It’s not just parents of RAD kids you’re helping by posting your stories on the Net. You’re helping those of us who have children like that inside of us, and can’t quite believe that anyone, anywhere, could ever love someone who wasn’t “good” all the time.  I wish the very best to you and all your family. Know that the good you do has even more power than you realize. Keep hanging in there, and take care of yourself above all."


Love is hard work...

and hard work sometimes


I am willing
to ask for help.

I recognize when
I need help.
Suz,  I loved the captain of the ship!   I think not of the Titanic, but an ARK.  A safe haven from those storms, where Acts of Random Kindness cancel out fear. I know that God will keep you safe and still the waters, and set you safely on dry land atop the mountain; for you have remained faithful just as Noah and his family. The sky is definitely not the same. God Grant you his perfect peace which surpasses all our human understanding through this difficult time of transition.  The world thought Noah was nuts too.  I am certain at times he may have questioned his own sanity.  You will recieve an olive branch of peace and a rainbow promise.   You are captain of an ARK, not a sinking ship.  You will not sink to the level of those with no hope.  I am confident that you will hear from the only Judge with any power or authority   "Well done good and faithful servant"   You and TLP and your family remain in my prayers.


Success is a journey...

not a destination.
Believe in yourself.

Ignore those who try to discourage you.

Don't give up
       and don't give in.                                                                  

"Hi everyone. I have been lucky enough to be able to meet TLP and his family. I wish you all knew him.  
My first impressions were, "What a nice polite young man."   So please don't any of you give up.  
Your sacrifice and love will be your pride and satisfaction one day in the child you are now caring for.  
TLP is an amazing young man and I wish you could all know him.
"TLP site has saved my sanity and our family. Without it I am sure I would have given up."

"TLP is a sanctuary... I love coming here.
I let all my guards down when posting here... this is my place of transparency. "